A Menu of Escalating Culinary Grotesquerie

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash

antipasto
Clogged artichoke heart, ravaged anchovy, engorged gouda
Squirrel prosciutto, cankered feta, distended olive

aperitivo
Clamato with scorched broccoli rabe and ulcerated slab bacon

insalata
Rancid baby spinach over infested beet
Flagellated Caesar with desiccated egg

pesce
Jaundiced tuna with blistered green bean
Stew of contaminated salmon
Lump decomposed trout with violated asparagus

carne
Pickled possum mélange
Fermented pork anus atop putrid potato
Pulverized raccoon shank with lacerated giblets
Unspecified Scottish ‘something’

dolce
Putrefied creme brûlée in disemboweled pigeon

digestivo
Miller High Life

Video editing/motion. Humor writing @ McSweeney’s, Weekly Humorist, Points in Case, et al. Debut novel CASH GRAB forthcoming this fall from Humorist Books.

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